STATUTORY / STRICT WARNING: This article is not to evoke sympathy or raise concerns. I certainly hope that in what ever circumstances you are going through or if things are not going the way you want it to be ....... keep your spirits up, be positive, and most of all keep smiling.
My late father, when alive would always say “In the midst of life, we are in death. I must say that I am happy to be alive and clicking …….. if not kicking after almost rubbing shoulders with death on THREE occasions. I believe, we live in an ANIMALS’ kingdom. They say that a CAT has nine lives, but with my ‘DOG’gedness it remains to be seen how many more deaths can I cheat until my number comes up.
The first encounter must have happened around 1991 on a cold winter’s night when I was in New Delhi those days. After a few drinks with a couple of buddies at well known club in South Delhi, there were three of us and two bikes between us. One was the grand old Royal Enfield Bullet and the other was a TVS Suzuki. I had the option of PIGgy backing on the Bullet, but some other animal instincts made me do so, on the Suzuki. Leo Tolstoy had written “The blood of beast is always in man. I really can’t tell after so many years which animals inherited our blood that night, but by the sequence of events it became evidently clear …… or at least it seemed. For some unknown reason the colleague who was riding the Suzuki suddenly took off as if it he was a STALLION participating in some derby. It just wasn’t HORSE sense at all. Not before long I could hear the “BULLet”et snorting behind in hot pursuit. While overtaking the Suzuki, one of the pedals of Bullet had the faintest of snick on that of the Suzuki. (I bet the cricket snick-o-meter’ of today would not have been able to register this snick. Oblivious to this fact the colleague on the Bullet sped away. That faintest of that snick sent the Suzuki spinning literally (I could see the sparks flying about like a Diwali flower pot!!!) with both of us, the rider – a six plus footer and a diminutive me thrown overboard. The road was so smooth that I was sent skiing on my back trying to use my hands as brakes until I came to stop precariously close to the median. Had my trajectory been headlong towards the median, I might be laughing somewhere else!!!!
The next was around 2001. It was a bad for business worldwide, with the dotcom businesses going bust and then September 11. Somewhere late that year I got struck with some strange ailment which I did not perceive it strange at first. Dismissing it as some form of a viral infection, I was on a self medication. However I started to get a swelling around my ankle with some pains in some joints. Tough, as I believe myself to be, I held on before even contemplating medical consultations. A day later while I was sipping broth at the dining table, I suddenly blacked out and fell to the ground. Thankfully, I did not land on my head, but a part of my shoulder broke the fall. I was not weak at that time, since I was having a normal diet. This is the first time I ever fainted, not due to weakness. When I got admitted to a well known hospital in the vicinity, it took several tests and medical specialists to “try” and deduce what I could possibly be ailing from. But after spending about ten days in hospital and put through many tests that made me feel like a GUINEA PIG, the closest diagnosis was that of streptococci infection or acute rheumatic fever (ARF). But as my medical advisor put it, I was rushed to the hospital just in time, as 24 hours later things could have gone worst. However after many subsequent check-ups and painful dosages of pencillin up the rear, the same medical advisor was to tell me that it may or may not have been a streptococci infection or ARF, but they did not want to take chances. WTF !!!! ….. isn’t it not by chance that we are living ????? We have no choice ;)))). Does not an old proverb say that “Chance make our parents” ???
The most recent encounter happened over the weekend at Bangalore. I happened to be there for a few business meet as well as meet up with a former colleague of more than two and a half decades ago since he too was on a business trip to Bangalore from the US of A. Around 7.45 p.m. on Friday 3rd June, I was trying to locate an address. I was walking along the pavement on Hosur Road very close to the renowned Baldwin Methodist College in Richmond Town. For those who are not familiar with Bangalore, this is one of the very important arterial roads that connects many areas in Bangalore. The pavement was about a foot above road level and the road – to use a term coined by Lallu Prasad some years ago, was as smooth as Hema Malini’s cheeks. – and no streetlights were alight on either sides. Probably the Bengaluru Municipal Corporation contemplated making some savings on electricity since the headlights of the oncoming traffic was dazzling indeed. That it was dazzling is true because most vehicles had their lights on full beam, but sadly the pavement was quite dark. However since the stretch of the pavement that I walked on was good, there was the old ‘ASS’umptions or ‘COCK’iness to assume that “The Road Ahead’ (Bill Gates …. You should read this !!!) would be just fine. Hardly had this thought settled in when my next step took me hurtling down the sidewalks. For just an eerie moment, it felt as if I was being sucked down the black hole of Calcutta !!!. When I landed on terra firma below and there were no slushy-mushy sounds, I was glad that at least my clothes would’nt have been messy. The immediate instinct was to get on to my feet. It was not funny as I looked up, as the pavement was at my chin level and there was not a soul nearby to seek assistance to haul myself up. If Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution came close that evening, the MONKEY instincts in me summoned some unknown strength and acrobatics to haul a 85 kgs frame up on the road without any thing to leverage or support upon. Taking stock of the situation, a stretch of slab a little over 5 feet was removed (and this was quite close to the Main gate of the Baldwin Methodist College.). In short it was almost like an open graveyard about 5+ feet in length, 2 feet in breadth and about 5 feet deep. Now what if ……………
a) The length of the slab removed was lesser than 5 feet ??? – I could have crashed my head on the opposite side during the plunge.
b) If there were rocks or sharp objects in the ditch below ??? – possibly same consequences as the above.
c) If the breadth of the slab was lesser that 2 feet???
d) Had I been knocked cold for hours.?? Only by daylight could some soul spot the one below.
Well pondering on what if all or any of the above happened could have been more CATastrophic. Rather than being RATtled by this, I walked a few steps and since there was no discomfort in the limbs, I was sure that no bones were broken. However there was a burning sensation in my right arm below and above the elbow. Upon inspecting it I was horrified to see bleeding lacerated skin. (see picture attached). Covering the wound with my handkerchief, the first thought was to rush to the nearest chemist or drugstore. Alas, for Bangalore, being India’s premier watering hole, there were more wine shops in the vicinity than chemists. Hoping to ward off any infection, the first reaction was to head to the wine shop and buy a quarter bottle and wash my wounds. For those who think that I am joking, alcohol is amongst the best anti-septics and is good for many an internal or external healing !!!. However the wine shop attendant, upon seeing my injury and suspecting my intentions guided me to the nearest drug store. Self medication with Dettol, Tincture Iodine and Neosporin powder did a lot of damage control unti I found my way to the hotel where my former colleague stayed. There I took a shower and did another round of dressing with assistance this time, and very soon we were back to old times joking about the times we had in the past over drinks and later dinner. When it was time for me to part, I thought I forgot to buy some Brufen tablets which would not only have paracetamol but also control any inflammation or bodily pain. To my good luck my former colleague had loads of them which he bought from the US. However when he packed quite a few for me to take home, I was surprised to see the it resembled exactly like the “blue pill”. I seriously asked him whether he was playing a joke for which he negatived. So I headed back to my hotel and after popping in a couple of the “blue pills” I waited for about ten minutes or so. Since nothing happened, I was glad it was not the blue pill after all inspite of being blue in color !!! It was then I used the webcam of my laptop to snap this picture, hoping that I could use this to file a FIR and sue the Bangalore Municipal Corporation.
The next morning when I awoke, There was no fever or any inflammation. So I guess everything was hunky dory and there was no fear of any infection. Since Saturday 4th June was a packed day, I just couldn’t contemplate the FIR or any action against the BMC. Caught up with a couple of business associates at the Koshy’s. A few drinks and BEEF steaks ensured that I would not only continue to be tough, but also had enough alcohol to ward off any internal infection. After lunch, had to rush to the UB City to catch up with a good friend and family from Chennai who happened to be in Bangalore. And later in the evening was invited by some friends for an event hosted at the Paparazzi in the Royal Orchids Hotel. In spite of some discomfort, the spirits and the skirts lighted up the evening, that I could really shake my legs on the dance floor almost until the midnight hour. All the events after that accident and catching up with old and new friends and the high spirits took my mind off the injury that really help the ugly wound towards a quicker healing process.
So dear friends, the message here is to always be positive, whatever be the situations or circumstances you are in. If you cannot, at least try. Walk with your head held high ….. but not so high as in the clouds !!!
